Partea interesanta este in josul pozei. Adica textul :D
Dick
In urma cu ceva vreme scriam articolul acesta, si primeam de la Octavian, cadou, o carte despre Penis. Am promis ca o citesc in concediu, dar fiind in format electronic si cum nu am avut chef sa mai car si laptopul pe varful muntelui, nu am mai citit-o atunci. In schimb, m-am delectat:) cu ea (cu cartea) weekendul asta.
Nu ca nu m-as fi asteptat :D dar (cartea) a fost o incantare continua… M-a cucerit inca de la titlurile capitolelor. Citez, selectiv si aleatoriu: Anatomy – how it hangs; Physiology: The ups and downs of a mobile organ; A right handful: Masturbation; Premature ejaculation: ‘Roger and out; etc.
In cazul in care cineva nu a aflat inca ce este penisul, iata defnitia din carte: The penis is a fleshy appendage that curls like a snail against the lower part of a man’s abdomen. At least that is how it looks in its flaccid, limp state. When a man is sexually excited, this little snail lengthens and thickens and sticks out at an upward angle from the belly—it is then hard and rigid—a ‘bone’. Hmm, o sa privesc melcii cu alti ochi de acum inainte :P
Cateva penis related facts:
– singurul penis care contine oase este cel de opossum. Oare sa o compatimim sau sa o invidiem pe opossumita?:)
– sperma contine o substanta fluorescenta (autoarele – Michele C. Moore and Caroline de Costa – speculeaza ca este pentru a fi vazuta de ovul in intuneric). Ma rog, poate si de amigdale :D.
– pensiul este folosit si ca obiect decorativ in numeroase culturi si uneori este tatuat. De unde si culmea tatuajului: sa iti tatuezi pe penis un penis mai mare decat al tau;)
– Testosteronul provine din colesterol, deci varu’ e indicat sa mananci cat mai multe gratare din alea de care iti plac tie:P;
– In Evul mediu barbatii purtau incaltari cu o forma lunga si ascutita pentru a indica doamnelor dimensiunile “dotarilor” lor. Azi se foloseste expresia “pula mea”, la fiecare doua fraze.
– In Kama Sutra barbatii sunt clasificati in: Iepuri (13 cm); Tauri (18 cm) si Cai (peste 25 cm). De aici si expresia Armasar?:P
– Barbatii care nu au facuta circumcizia nu vor intra in rai. Hmmm, sa-mi ascut toporul, baieti?:P
– Chiar si peste 50 sau 60 de ani – it happens. Bolile de inima, tensiunea arteriala mare, lipsa vederii, lipsa auzului, artrita sau chiar pierderile de memorie nu te impiedica sa te bucuri de o viata sexual activa. Vesti bune, nu Aline? :D
– Prezervativele sunt supuse unor teste de calitate care implica curentul electric, aerul si apa. In Statele Unite cantitatea de apa cu care se testeaza permeabilitatea prezervativelor este de 300 ml iar in Marea Birtanie este de 3 l. Well, do you speak English?
Trecand peste parea fun si comentariile mai mult sau mai putin aluzive…multe alte lucruri interesante si serioase veti afla, citind cartea. Dupa cum zice si titlul: un ghid util pentru baieti si fete. Pana atunci, bonus:), copy/paste lista cu variatele denumiri pe care penisul le-a primit de-a lungul timpului, unele mai fun decat altele.
Enjoy! Da, SI de lista ;)
Aaron’s rod
Action man
Arrow (in fact, all weapons are
popular)
Artillery
Assailant
Baby maker
Bag boy
Bag of tricks
Bald root
Ballcock
Balls (not strictly penis)
Banana
Banger (also Big banger)
Battering ram
Beak
Beef bayonet (also Hot beef)
Bell boy
Bellpull
Best man
Big banana
Big Bob
Big boy
Big honcho, big bamboo
Big man on campus
Big one
Blade
Blind Bob
Blind eye
Blind man
Bludgeon
Bob
Boner
Broom handle
Bush beater
Candle
Cannon
Captain Standish
Captain, cavalier
Carnal man
Carrot
Chap (also Old chap)
Cherry picker
Chilli (with various adjectives)
Chopper
Chucker, chuck
Clothes pin or peg
Club
Cock, cocksman
Codpiece
Crack hunter
Cranny hunter
Creamsickle
Creamstick
Crimson bird (a red paloma?)
Crown jewels
Cuckoo
Cucumber (or vegie of your
choice)
Cupid’s torch
Cyclops
Dick (of course!) and aka Moby
Dickety boy
Diddler
Didgeridoo
Dildo (also a fake penis)
Ding-a-ling
Dingbat
Ding-dong, dingle, dingle-dangle
Dingus
Diplomat
Dipstick
Disturber of the peace (piece)
Do-funny
Do-gooder
Donger, dong
Donut puncher
Doodle
Dork
Dragon
Dribbler
Drumstick
Dum-dum
Eel
Egghead
End piece
Engine
Equipment
Erogenous part
Extension
Faithful friend
Faithful servant
Family jewel
Fanny rat
Father confessor
Fellow, also fella, little fella and
old fellow/fella
Fiddle bow
Finger
Fingamajig
Flip-flop
Flute
Flying blowtorch
Flying dick
Fornicator
Frankfurter
Freudian tip (not bad!)
Frigger
Fruit
Fucker (and more along these
lines which we’ll leave to your
imagination)
Gap stopper
Gem
General
Generator
Gentle tickler
Giggle stick
Girl pleaser
Girlometer
Gold digger
Goober
Gooseneck
Grand masterpiece
Gravy giver
Greenstick
Grinding tool
Grunt iron
Hambone
Headlight
Hermit
Hoe handle
Hooded bandit
Horn
Hose
Hot pudding
Hotrod, hotdog
Implement
Instrument
Irish root
Iron
Jack
Jade scepter
Jade stem
Jerking iron
Jerktown
John Thomas
Johnson
Joint
Jokester
Jolly Roger
Joy knob
Joy stick
Juice man
Junior
Kit and caboodle
Knob
Knocker
Kojak, Yul Brynner
(or any bald-headed man)
Ladies’ delight
Lamp of life (really!)
Lead joint
Lead pipe clincher
Leg
Life preserver
Lingam
Lip splitter
Little man, little fireman
Lizard
Lollipop
Love gun, love trumpet, love tool,
love sausage, etc., etc.
Love sword, love pole, love pistol
Lunchbox (the whole package, we
guess)
Magic wand
Manhood mushroom
Marrowbone
Meat (also man meat)
Member (gold and other colours)
Milkman
Missile, heat-seeking missile
Monk, also monkey
Mousie
Mr Floppy (who’d admit to that
one?)
Mr Happy
Mr Jones Mulligan
Mr Know-it-all
Muscle of love, also inflatable
muscle of love
My affair
My business end
My little buddy
Nag
Nature’s masterpiece
Nature’s scythe
Nice little piece of possibility
Nine-inch knocker (above the
national average, see ‘size’)
Noodle
Nose
Nuthouse
Old blind Bob
Old boy, old sausage and many
similar endearments
Old Horny
Old Jack
Old Slimy
One-eyed Jack
One-eyed trouser snake
Organ of generation
Oscar
Peacemaker
Pecker
Pee pee
Peewee
Pego
Pendulum
Percolator
Percy (for pointing at the
porcelain)
Perker up
Peter, Pete, old Pete
Phallus
Pikestaff
Pile driver
Pilgrim’s staff
Pillar, pillar of ivory
Pioneer
Pipe
Pipe organ
Pisser
Pistol
Piston
Plank
Plaything
Pleasure machine
Plough
Plug
Plum picker
Point
Poker
Pole
Poontagger
Pork sword
Potent regiment
Potz, putz
Priapus
Prick
Pride and joy
Privates
Proboscis
Prong
Pud (as in ‘pulling the pud’)
Pump
Purple-headed love warrior
Purple people eater (a generational
thing)
Quartermaster
Quim
Rabbit
Radish (vegies again)
Rainstick
Ramrod, rod
Randy mole
Reamer
Rector
Red cap
Red hot poker
Reverend
Richard (Dick to his friends!)
Roger and out
Roger (also Roger Ramjet)
Rolling pin
Rooster
Ruffian
Rump splitter
Saint Peter
Salami, old salami
Sausage (fries with that?)
Sceptre
Schlong
Schmock
Screwdriver
Seat of strength
Semi-automatic
Sexing piece
Shaft
Short arm
Slug
Snake in the grass
Solicitor general
Spear of love
Spindle
Spunker
Stalk
Stallion
Steed
Stem
Stick
Sting
Stud poker
Stump
Stumper
Submarine
Sword
Tailpipe
The professor
The Right Honorable Member
for Underpants (really?)
Thing
Third leg
Thorn in the flesh
Thumb of love
Thunderstick
Tickler
Todger
Tonsil tickler
Tool
Torch
Trickster
Trigger
Trouser snake, trouser serpent,
trouser wasp
Truncheon
Tube of lipstick
Unicorn
Utensil
Veined sausage
Wanger, wing wang
Wanker
Water spout
Water works
Wazoo
Weapon
Wedding tackle
Wee wee, weenie, weiner, woo
woo
Whip
Whore pipe
Wife’s best friend
Wig-wag, wick, winkle
Willie
Winkie, wee willie winkie, winky
Worm
Yang
Yard (you wish!)
Yard stick (ditto)
Yum-Yum
Zeppelin
Alina Sighete 